Sunday, December 11, 2016

My dad.

While the pain of losing my dad right before Thanksgiving is still raw and surreal, I feel compelled to share a little about the week we said goodbye. Unexpectedly and painfully we lost my dad on November 10th. It is still so hard to believe and will be as far as I can imagine. It's so hard to put into words so I will share some pictures and a post I shared on Facebook. His loss affects so many, and we all feel the pain of losing him. The support and love we have is amazing and gives us a bright spot for the future. He is missed terribly, it hurts, but he is no longer dealing with the pain he endured everyday. Even though Michigan may not be winning every game here on earth, you can bet he watches Michigan win every Saturday up there in heaven!

Some of my most favorite pictures. We found the best pictures of him!








 This was the last time I saw him and hugged him. So thankful I had that time with him.

My handsome dad. He was our rock. He was my first love. He taught me so much. As I got older and started my own family, I was so grateful for his sound advice. He was so proud of all four of us kids. He & my mom just celebrated 39 years, college sweethearts & best friends. They survived his 70's hair! They were such an inspiration to me & Jeremy. He ADORED Hannah & Owen. The three of them had a hidden stash of snacks that was always their secret ;) I'm so sad he never met Beau. But we'll have so many stories to tell him.
He would do anything for anyone & never ask for anything in return.  And gosh was he smart. He loved playing golf, Michigan football, horse racing & the beach. I will cherish the times we had at Seabrook, I'm so heartbroken he never got the chance to retire there. However, I know he's in heaven on a golf course on the beach, betting on horse races, listening to a Michigan game yelling "yeah baby!" every time they score!
He was the strongest person I've ever known. He beat cancer, tore his Achilles' tendon playing softball & still ran to first base, played golf a week after his first stroke (talk about stubborn!) He dealt with so many health problems from his cancer treatment but you'd never know. He never let anything stop him & he NEVER complained.
He'd hate all this crying over him, he'd say it's part of life. But we loved that man so much.
My heart is broken for my mom, but she's the strongest woman I know. We will get through this knowing one day, we'll see him again. I wish I could've hugged him one more time. We'll celebrate his life because that's what he would've wanted. Please pray for our family as we say goodbye to him. ❤️

Saying goodbye was extremely painful but the week we all shared together was good for the soul. We are the luckiest people because he was ours. I only wish everyone knew him. He was LOVED by so many. His celebration proved that to be true, so many people came out to support us, and share hilarious moments with Craig!

 A toast to Craig!
 Cookies that represent so many things he loved. If only he had made it to Seabrook, but we know he is there, pain free, waiting for us to join him one day.


Love you dad. I know he'd reply with "Love you Dod"



Wednesday, November 30, 2016

Beau Miller Adkins 10.7.16

Our sweet, sweet baby boy has arrived! It was such a special day, and although I could totally do without major abdominal surgery, I'd do it all over again for this precious baby. I was so nervous for the dynamics of three kids, having a new baby and all that goes along with it all but this kid stole our hearts from the very moment we saw his sweet face! I can, with complete certainty say he is definitely our last. I actually never really thought there would be a third but now could not even imagine our life without him! I have SO Much to catch up on. That will come at another time, things have gotten a tad busier. Guess I should've taken advantage of those 9 months!

My original due date was October 12, we decided that if I had not gone into labor on my own, we would have a c-section date as back up.  I was pretty sure he'd never come on his own, just like the others! I really was happy with my doctor, even though my date got changed three times. You can't do that to a pregnant lady! So thankfully, out of the 7th, 9th and 11th, we were able to secure the 7th, even though it was at 5:30 pm. You also shouldnt tell a pregnant lady she cant eat OR drink for 8 hours all day. Now that was tough! But worth it so that we could have the 7th.

By the end of my pregnancy I was pretty miserable. For some reason, this one was really hard. I was super sick in the beginning, which I was with the other two, but for some reason after 4 years I had completely forgotten how hard it was. And by the end, physically, this was definitely the hardest on me. I could barely move or walk. I for sure thought he was 10 pounds ha ha. I was SO ready to have him. I was actually pretty sure he was going to come on his own, but he patiently waited :)


My mom came a week before my scheduled date, which was a HUGE blessing. It's actually amazing how incredible Gods timing is. Even though we want things in our own time, his timing is so much better than ours. My c-section date fell perfectly during her fall break. We never could have had 18 days with her if it had not worked out that way. The week before he came we did SO much. We also squeezed in dates, naps, quality time with the kids, it was so great having that time.

On Friday the 7th, I had to keep myself busy, not eating or drinking was tough. So we ran some errands, I cleaned, picked up Owen from school, Jeremy worked, it seemed like just another day! We headed to the hospital around 2:30, got all checked in and ready for my surgery which was at 5:00. I was really nervous about the side effects of the morphine, with Owen I got super nauseous, and extremely itchy. I think I had way too much morphine so I was nervous to feel like that again but this time was much better. The surgery went great, our big boy was born at 5:52 and a shock to us all, had the cord wrapped around his neck THREE times. My doctor was just as shocked and couldn't believe it. They got him out and were a little concerned about his breathing, but they let me have him on my chest and he started to get out all the fluid, I was SO thankful they didnt have to take him. I really wanted him to stay with me. We had a really great nurse and baby nurse, they were all wonderful. I was super numb all over, my arms and hands were so numb it was bizarre, but they assured me it was normal. And I was FREEZING. I guess it makes up for being hotter than heck all summer! We got back to the recovery room and about an hour later the fun began! The kids got to meet sweet Beau!

 Baby day!! Right before we headed to the hospital!
 Brand new!!




 The nurses were so sweet to take lots of pictures. We were very happy with our hospital experience.
 LOVE this picture.
 I remember being so numb I could barely talk or move my face ha ha

My doctor came into the OR with a GO pro and filmed the surgery! Pretty neat to see it. He put it on you tube with some sweet music then texted Jeremy the next day. I am grateful we have that video!
 It was SO Fun watching them with him. Love at first sight!



 He is SUCH a great big brother.


 Oh how I would go back to this day in a heartbeat.



 Melts my heart!








The nurses were great with the kids, they got to help with Beau's first bath, hold him as much as they wanted, they gave them ice cream, and really made them feel special.
 I just love squishy newborn faces.
 Having Beau made Owen seem SO big.








 I loved his little head of hair. Not as much as Hannah but way more than Owen!
 One of my favorite pics!

 My WHOLE world. I feel so complete.




 The kids were so interested in all that was happening with Beau.





 They let the kids help with his bath. Owen just wanted to watch but Hannah was sweet to bathe him.








I'm not really sure who he looks like, some pictures I see Owen but as he's getting bigger I see Hannah more.

 Hannah, Owen, Beau

But this is where I see Owen, Owen is on the left, Beau on the right!

I stayed in the hospital from Friday to Monday. Saturday evening, Sunday early AM I got hit with the WORST pain Ive ever been in. The internal stitches were pulling, I had overdone it I guess, and my nurse wasnt sharing the pain meds so I was in some serious pain. Staying until Monday was a good idea. Jeremy stayed with me each night, I am grateful for that, I know those hospital "beds" arent comfortable. But this was a special time for us. Once my mom took the kids home for the night we would eat some dinner, spend some quiet time with Beau and enjoy our last hospital stay. The kids came often and it was so fun to have them there. Until they started getting crazy ha ha.

He looks so tiny here. He was 8.14 at birth and I'm pretty sure he only lost 6 oz when we left. They were concerned he was jaundice because our blood types were different and a positive and a negative, but they tested him very often and he was doing great. I miss that tiny baby already!
Jeremy had a meeting Monday morning so after that, he came and picked me up, we went to Starbucks and then picked Owen up at school ha ha. I guess that's what you do when you have three kids!  The adventure begins!!